amberstrike13:

Sooo turns out the look my girlfriend gives me when she wants sex is the same look she gives when she wants me to get her ice cream

Honestly it makes total sense

(via ithinkiwillgotoboston)

cheese3d:

nothings worse than soft grapes

(via 13thmoon)

fartgallery:

fartgallery:

so one morning I woke up to go to school and saw that my roommate left me this note

so I walked into the kitchen and then saw that he was actually serious

except inside the bag was a handful of cheerios, a pack of sweet tarts, and a raw potato

also he was upset that I didn’t eat it so he moved the sign

(via lampsarepeopletoo)

jpgay:

me flirting: if you were a cheeto you’d be a hot cheeto 

(via lampsarepeopletoo)

thekoldiaries:

riddlemetom:

sweden has invented a carbonated water that tastes exactly like chocolate milkshake this could be the cure for obesity where is the nobel prize 

(via lampsarepeopletoo)